Longing for Relatedness in our Lives
When not in a relationship we spend many an hour wishing we were, experiencing a deep longing for something we believe would make us whole. Once in a relationship many of us spend time wishing it could be better, more satisfying, less fractious, more stable and dependable. When out of a relationship we spend time grieving and pining for what has been lost, remembering only the good and that it is not recoverable. If only ....
The reference to finding a 'soul mate' is often referred to as the epitome of life, but is it a myth?
Personality differences and clashes can block forward progression and problem solving ability in relationships. Communication can sour as time passes. Beyond species survival, natural instinct and urges to perpetuate the gene pool, childbearing, then childrearing can provide incentives to stay together. Although an extremely good job can be done by single parent families the complementary nature of couples and togetherness can provide a positive foundation.
Some tips to keep your relationship in good shape:
* Talk by showing interest, caring and empathy.
* Truly connect on all levels - common interests, intimacy, sharing moments.
* Regulate emotions by being in control and giving as well as receiving.
* Stop criticising and become more nurturing.
* See the good and build on this as it becomes your source of reference for the future.
* Show generosity of spirit in thoughts and actions.
* Keep intimacy fresh and alive.
* Make memories together by planning an interesting and varied life together.