This week I attended a workshop on Compassion Focused Therapy, how uplifting it was to have it reinforced that all the rubbish that we experience in life 'is not our fault'. Paul Gilbert, a renowned therapist and publisher in this field, spoke about our genetic wiring, our social influences and upbringing being the key factors influencing how we function. We decide what version of ourselves we put out there in to the world each day and sometimes the self critic gets the better of us. We are all out there just trying to be the best we can with what we have inherited - both physically and mentally and when it goes wrong it really is 'just not our fault'. So recognising this we just have to let go of the self critic, which makes us feel bad about ourselves and show ourselves and others compassion and kindness in how we conduct our lives would seem the logical way forward. As humans though not too hot on logic so needs commitment and work to establish this way of being, but oh so worth it in the long run. Well how can we do this? It is really not too difficult. Just need to create the right conditions in our lives. Cultivate the compassionate self and reap the benefit, stop being so hard on yourself. Take responsibility for your own happiness and leg go of all the rubbish that is in our lives, it doesn't have to signal who are you, it is just one version of you that your putting out there today. Make it your motto going in to 2016 - It is not my fault but today I take responsibility for my happiness by showing care, compassion and empathy.